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I
The so-called "Buffalo Herd
Theory"
I do not remember
now whether it was Wolfgang
Stuetzel or
Luis Moras who expounded this
"touchy" theory
while I was home last October. Nevertheless, I am sharing it
here to "enlighten" our "broad-minded" friends in the Bais-Tanjay area. It's like this:
"... A herd of buffalo can only move as fast
as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is
the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This
natural selection is good for
the herd as a whole,
because the general speed
and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular
killing of the weakestmembers.
"In much the same
way, the human brain can
only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive
intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it
attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way,
regular consumption of beer
and liquor eliminates
the weaker brain cells,
making the brain a faster and more efficient machine... "
That's why Tanjayanons always feel
smarter
after a round of Tanduayor SanMiguel!
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Let me tell you a crazy story I heard recently.
There's this
husband who out of sheer love for
his wife decided . to prove it to her. So he swam the widest
oceans, crossed the deepest rivers, and climbed the highest
mountains to show his deep
devotion to her. But in
the end, she divorced
him. Why? Because he was never home. (Get it?)
Let
me tell you an experience I had as a kid.
One day, I asked Mom, "Why do my shoes keep eating my socks?"
As a young boy, that was always a mystery for me. All my other
classmates never had that problem. Their socks remained tight
and high up their legs the entire day. Mom didn't answer my question
but simply gave me two rubber bands which I dutifully placed
around the top of my socks. To this day, fifteen years later, I
still have permanent circle
marks around my legs.
But aside from giving me
this slight defect, the two bands worked like magic. It
never occurred to me that Dad and Mom
didn't have the money to buy a new pair of socks for me. So I wore
five-year-old socks, all soggy, grayish, and garterless. And yet
amazingly, I never complained. I believe it was because Dad was
always home when I needed him. Every night, after coming from
work, we'd jog together, sit around, and talk about Tarzan, Farrah
Fawcett Majors, God, and what I wanted to be when I grew up (a
stockholder!).
On Saturdays, we'd take a walk, eat a
hot-dog-on-a-stick, and buy new rubber bands before going home. I've
learned that in truth, we don't want our loved ones to show their
love for us in big ways. Swimming the widest oceans, crossing the
deepest rivers, and climbing the highest mountains seem
spectacular - but that's not
what we really want.
Deep in our hearts, we
just want them home. With us. Sometimes, God will operate that way.
Suddenly, He decides not to answer our prayers, or fill our
need, or heal our sickness, or give us the miracle we're asking
for. (He's got reasons why He won't, and
believe me - they're pretty good ones.) (cont 'd)
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So He'll just be there beside you, holding you
in a hug.
Sharing your pain.
Weeping as you weep.
Oh, He might give you some rubber bands. And
that small
comfort from Him will be more than enough to
sustain you.
Because the most essential truth you already
know:
"Daddy's home!."
By: Bo Sanchez
From his book: Thank God He's Boss! |
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III
How Much?
One day Satan and Jesus were having a
conversation.
Satan had just come from the Garden of Eden,
and he
was gloating and boasting. "Yes, sir, I just
caught the world
full of people down there. Set me a trap, used
bait I knew
they couldn't resist. Got 'em all!"
"What are you going to do with them?" Jesus
asked.
Satan replied, "Oh, I'm gonna have fun! I'm
gonna
teach them how to marry and divorce each
other, how to
hate and abuse each other, how to drink and
smoke and
curse. I'm gonna teach them how to invent guns
and bombs
and kill each other. I'm really gonna have
fun!"
"And what will you do when you get done with
them?"
Jesus asked.
"Oh, I'll kill 'em," Satan glared proudly.
"How much would you want for them?" Jesus
asked.
"Oh, you don't want those people. They ain't no
good. Why, you'll take them and they'll just
hate you.
They will spit on you, curse you and kill
you!! Ohh, you
don't want those people!!"
"How much?" Jesus asked again.
Satan looked at Jesus and sneered, "All your
tears, and
all your blood."
Jesus said, "DONE!"
Then He paid the price.
Special
thanks to:
Phillippe Matthew C. Torres
Danville, IL |
THOUGHTS TO LIVE BY:
1. The truth is good, but not all truth is
good to say.
2. A long life may not be good enough. A good
life is
what's good enough.
3. Behind an able man, there's always another
able man.
4. A happy marriage requires falling in love
many times -
with the same person.
5. Contentment is wanting what you have, not
having
everything you want.
And remember:
Life is basically simple. It's the people
who make it complicated. Let's simplify life.
Live
according to our means. Dream big - but don't
try to reach
for the sky. Life,
after all, is not a contest. Enjoy it.
Thanks to: Frank L. Somera
Abilene, TX
Papang's reminder: " ...more things are
wrought by prayers
than this world ever dreams of...
Evelyn R. Oracion, MD
Tanjay City |
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